Popular Notion of Poise is Misleading

Understanding what poise is, is an important first step to overcoming shyness or gaining poise.

There are many misconceptions about what poise is. Such misconceptions have hampered many shy people. If you accept the subtle influences around you regarding what poise is, you may not go far overcoming shyness.

For example, through the movies they watch, the stars they are awed about or the social media optics they embrace, many people have allowed themselves to be subtly, but surely, socially induced into accepting a wrong notion of poise. Don’t let this happen to you! If you want to overcome shyness, gain poise, or become more socially influential, consider the real meaning of poise. Doing this is your first step to overcoming shyness and gaining poise.

Do Yourself a Favour With a Brief Exercise

Did you really know what poise is? Don't be too sure you did!

Here is a little exercise for starter. Before you read further, take a pen and a note pad. Jot down three characteristics you believe a well-poised person should possess. Don’t ask anybody around you. Just take, say, five minutes to think and reflect on your personal experience or assumptions regarding what you think a well-poised person is. Do that now!...

How many of your three items have to do with the person’s appearance?

Now, perhaps, you may want to be a bit more adventurous or venturesome. Ask some relatives, friends, or associates to each write down what they think are three of the characteristics of a well-poised person.

How do they rate? Chances are that most of the characteristics they volunteered are about a person’s appearance.

Poise is Beyond Carriage or Elegance!

It is important to understand what poise is all about, in real sense. Experience has shown that misconceptions regarding confidence, poise, and social influence affect shy people. One area involves how they perceive issues of people's appearance and competencies. Apparently, what people say about such issues or what they see in movies, celebrities or pop stars have affected many of them.

You see, for so long, many misconceptions have been bandied around in everyday usage that many people apparently don't know what poise is. Many people have unknowingly associated poise with people's appearance. Socialization or conditioning has made many to believe wrongly that poise is a matter of the body. This has become such a problem to the extent that many people confuse poise with elegance.

Elegance is a matter of appearance. Poise is beyond carriage and appearance. It is important to understand this difference clearly at this point. If you find this to be a hard buy, you are not alone. Understanding this difference and accepting what poise is—in real terms, underpin the basic knowledge you should have to start overcoming shyness, gaining poise or enhancing your poise level.

If you are passionate about overcoming low self esteem and shyness, gaining poise, or becoming more socially influential, consider and explore the real meaning of poise.

Get the Halo Off the Hello

It would be good and much beautiful if an elegant person always possesses poise. However, this is not necessarily so. The tendency to see an elegant person to be a poised person is part of the wrong tendency in people perception, called halo effect.

The halo effect, in a layman's parlance, is the tendency to attribute particularly good or positive attributes to an individual based on a single characteristic that they possess which we see as rather alluring or note worthy. However, it can be the obverse. That is, the tendency to associate wrong or negative attributes to a person based on a single characteristic that they possess which we see as not rather alluring or note worthy.

This is a reason why people would perceive the apparently nice-looking guy or the blonde-haired woman who cheerily greets them along the street—or by the swimming pool—as a good person or woman. That’s a bonus for the guy or the blonde-haired woman as they have benefited from the ‘halo effect’.

In real sense, however, poise is more than a matter of the body—the appearance. It is more than the cheery smiles plus hello in the case of the swimming pool bloke or blonde-haired woman.

Poise, is a matter of the heart and of the mind! Poise has to do with social ease, emotional balance, and mental acuity. In a much broader sense, poise has to do with self-mastery—and the capacity to be on top of things, particularly in adversities and emotionally stressful situations.

<p> Never confuse elegance with poise: Elegance is a matter of appearance. Poise is beyond carriage and appearance. It is important to understand this difference. </p>

Focus More on Emotional and Mental Soundness

In a nutshell, poise is more about the heart—and the mind—than about the body.

It is more of your internal mental and emotional acuity than your appearance. You would be on your way to overcoming shyness, gaining poise, or mastering your perceived personal imperfections, through an appropriate program of personal poise development if you really understand and accept this important difference.

You would make good progress with the integrated personal poise and self esteem building system. Learn More